This image may feel like it is depicting the ultimate power mom, nursing her second baby at the end of a race. In fact I was building my chocolate business, I had just had my second child, and was literally running away from looking deeply at whether my life was satisfying and nourishing, and instead running quickly in the other direction, determined not to look at how unhappy I was.

Six years later, I ended my marriage, spent four years mediating (and meditating!), and calmly finalized a high conflict divorce, all while managing to become an incredibly present, available and joyful mom.

I am the best version of myself because of my incredibly difficult divorce, not in spite of it. I learned in the trenches how to listen for that inner sense that always knows. I learned how to see through the fear and to experience the incredible freedom there is in surrender, no matter how counter that may seem to society’s stories of what it takes to be a strong, successful woman.